Yeah I know I've been quite inactive for a while; to the point where it feels like the words are just bursting to come out. There's so much I WANT to say but never got around to. There's so much I need to write. Wow, at 1: 36 a.m., it seems ironic that I just opened my blog to write this entry down. I've been on a mind journey all this while, but what I realized on the way is that it won't ever end; this journey to find myself. Indeed, it would take an eternity to list every emotion or experience that I've learnt from. Moving on, pondering over the past seems like an unexplained blessing; tears for the harsh memories and smiles from the blissful memories. I should probably get down to writing something eventful, an incident perhaps? But no, right now, I'm just going to write down any thought that comes to my mind. Ah, how I've missed writing! This joy, it can not be compared to any other joy in the world. This feeling of ecstasy when the sentences are completed and the blanks are filled up. I don't think this joy has ever made me feel more alive.
'Cogito Ergo Sum' in case you don't know what it means, I believe its time to do some googling in the next tab. Anyway, moving on, here's a plan I've come up with. I'm going to stop doing whatever I'm doing and start writing whenever a writing flair hits me. The instant I get that inspiration, I'll get down to work immediately. Long have I craved for the path of becoming a writer, too long have I stayed away from it. Now, I'm going to take up this passion seriously and actually mean business when I say I'm ardent about writing; I live to write. I think, therefore I am and it is that I am that I can actually sum up my thoughts and beliefs into words for the world to read.
Writing means everything to me; it defines me as a person. It makes me who I am and who I want to be. It is the one activity I have indulged in whenever I felt low and the consequences of neglecting it at a time of need has indeed cost me dearly. Though this is nowhere like my usual posting, I still think I had to get it all out, here, on my blog and now that I have done that, I guess its time for a bit of serious writing. Here's something I wrote back in April last year but never got around to posting: [I know the language's a bit crude and its a bit unpolished but I wanted to post it without editing anything out. Yes, I also know it seems incomplete but hey writer's block isn't a choice now is it?]
You realize
you are gifted,
You realize
you are blessed,
But only at
a time when you’re estranged from a cozy bed,
At the dead
of the night,
When the
entire world snores,
You wake up
and realize how lucky you are
To even have
made it so far.
When people all
over the world are dying,
When
orphaned babies are seamlessly crying,
When kids
from around have to beg for food,
And here you
were sulking because someone was rude,
When wars
are spreading,
and the
horizons have enclosed,
The fields
of peace,
Into tiny
monarchies disposed,
To liars and
thieves,
Who will
rest not till they gain
All there
is, in their depraved domains.
When floods
are destroying homes,
and
earthquakes shatter grounds,
When global
warming’s a threat,
To all that
it surrounds,
When living is
a burden, to those estranged of joy
When death
is just a word that will sooner or later destroy,
The ones who
breathe,
the lowest
point of desperation,
The
fragments of an unconscious mind,
The realization
of annihilation.
When trying
times lead to increasing suicides,
and the
strength to muster courage fails,
When life
seems to have lost every purpose,
And no door
seems to let light pass through,
There will
be appointed a way out,
specifically
for you.
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